Producer and compere Reuben Kaye is one of the brightest spots on the London circuit (not least because of his acclaimed new show Cabaret des Distractions) but he has many admirers outside the capital. Last week saw him in Berlin but now he is off to the land of Abba, opera and Ikea for the Stockholm International Burlesque Festival. For This Is Cabaret, he has kindly (and exclusively) offered to share his thoughts with us. Feel free to catch up on Part One and Part Two before getting stuck into the latest adventures.
Arrived at Arlanda airport safe and sound. I’m sure I drilled on the nice man next to me but he was too Scandiwegian to do anything but smile at me. Arlanda airport is beautiful and clean. It also has some of the most ridiculous, expensive shopping. You can buy designer bedding and beds here. At an airport.
Now I’m in my shuttle service from the airport to Stockholm where Fraulein Frauke has organised someone to escort me to my hotel. She knows exactly how capable I am on my own. I am basically the cabaret Helen Keller. Round the clock supervision baby! Preferably by Audrey Hepburn. For those who don’t know Fraulein Frauke is the co-producer of the Stockholm Burlesque Festival. She does this alongside her husband John-Paul Bichard, a renowned burly/variety photographer who has shot me many times and each time makes me look amazing..and not the bastard love-child of Tammy Faye-Baker and Seabiscuit.
I think I have a moment in my hotel before I get picked up for soundcheck at the venue. I will of course use this time to rifle through the hotel room and see exactly how much alcohol is complimentary. Alcohol in this country is sold by government-run shops and the tax on it is astronomical. Why didn’t I bring a bottle from Berlin?! It’s almost on the national health system there!
Ugh. The hotel is gorgeous. The bathroom is the size of my apartment in London. All the people look like models. Way to go Sweden. Your happy, welcoming, beautiful, successful country makes my insides turn to venom. Unless I pick up a hot guy tonight in which case TAK SVERIGE!
Met Tigger in the lobby, will meet Natsumi Scarlett later on. She’s incredible, he’s an icon. What the hell am I doing here? I think I’ll hit on a waiter.
Watch this space for Part Four…